SEX IN PERSPECTIVE
"S*x lies at the root of life, we can never learn to reverence life
until we know how to understand S*x" - Henry Havelock Ellis
Today’s S*x saturated multi-media portraying orgasmic shampoos, phallic
cars and arousing soft drinks would indicate that we are a S*x obsessed
culture, reminding us that this is our primal drive in life. According to
research revealed in “S*x, A Man’s Guide,” the average American teenager
views S*xual encounters on TV 14,000 times a year. Despite the hard sell with S*x
not everyone is buying the assumption that S*x is the supreme goal of life.The
increased quantity of exposure to S*x is matched by the declining understanding
of quality loving S*x and it's implications. Despite the S*xual liberation
movement, Master's and Johnson's S*x research, the Hite Report and countless
magazine articles, S*x, for many, remains a dissatisfying and loveless
encounter, motivated by lust or loneliness, often sadly devoid of true love,
intimacy and pleasure. A recent Oprah Winfrey show on libido cited statistics
that 40 million American women suffer from low libido. The audience was full of
angst ridden women who couldn’t match their partners desire for S*x. Resorting
to testosterone creams and HRT, it was an unspoken assumption that low libido
was a disease that required treatment. Everyone had bought the multi media lie
that we are less than human if we don’t have a voracious and insatiable S*x
desire. Does that mean Mother Theresa had a less fulfilling and meaningful life
than say Hugh Hefner?
The Ancient Indian scriptures represented in Ayurveda help us to put S*x
in perspective. It advises judicious indulgence in S*x. Emphasising our faculty
of disrimination concerning quality and quantity. S*xual union is portrayed as
an experience with more profound implications than pleasure. It instructs us
how to make S*xual union a sacred consciousness expanding experience that opens
up our heart to love ourselves and all beings with increased passion. It also
teaches that S*xual desire is ultimately a yearning for an unconditional loving
relationship between ourselves and the divine. A spiritual connection that will
satiate all our desires.
YEARNING FOR INTIMACY
The frenetic preoccupation with S*x that characterises western culture
is often completely unrelated to S*xual needs but more an expression of a
thirst for intimacy, touch and tenderness. It is borne out of a need to feel
loved unconditionally, as a baby is loved . This is reflected in lover's use of
'baby-talk' and seemingly immature interactions.
Obviously love and S*x are not mutually exclusive. You can have loveless
S*x and you can express S*xless love. The negative practice of loveless S*x is
having a dramatic impact on our society today. Soaring incidences of rape,
necrophilia, sadism, masochism, pedophilia and incest reflect the incredibly
destructive influence of the promotion of loveless S*x. Unloving S*x is not
just available but socially acceptable - brothels, inflatable lovers and
promiscuity lead us away from intimacy and sensitivity, towards a dehumanised,
impersonal S*xuality of perversity. S*x is often used as a tool of domination
and power by men whereas women may use S*x as a means to manipulate a man or as
a love substitute. The choice to remain celibate or a virgin until an
opportunity to have a meaningful union with a loving partner is often judged as
naive or a sign of mental illness. We have under-valued and under-estimated
both the destructive potential of loveless S*x and the creative force of loving
S*x. It is for this reason that many spiritual philosophies share the advice
given by Ayurveda, that S*x should only be shared by a loving couple as true
satiation only arises from the union of emotions, body and soul.
BONDING RELAXATION
In order to sustain the expression of love in a partnership a bonding
relaxation exercise is recommended as a daily practice.
The couple lie together in the spoon position on their left sides to
promote the flow of energy. The partner in need of the most nurturing should
lie on the inside, enveloped by their partner. This allows the alignment of the
couple’s chakras and the exchange of loving energy. Both partners’ right hands
can rest over the inner person’s heart. Lying comfortably together, close your
eyes and concentrate on your breathing. Inhaling and exhaling together helps to
create a harmony and synchronicity between one another. You may like to
incorporate a soothing visualisation to enhance the experience.
Visualise a pink light flowing through your heart chakra and surrounding
your bodies creating an aura of love and tenderness. This is to be done without
any S*xual interaction.
Benefits of this have been researched by S*xologist Dr. Rudolf Von Urban
who concluded that this practice creates a resonance effect called entrainment,
an alignment of energy fields that triggers profound healing in both partners.
TANTRIC S*X
In tantra, S*xual union is seen as a sacred activity whose ultimate goal
is self actualisation. In the tantric tradition, S*x is utilised as a means to
raise the flow of energy from the base of the spine to the crown chakra thus
re-awakening one's dormant cosmic consciousness. This process is known as
utsavam. (Ut meaning upward and savam meaning flow). Another concern of tantra
is to integrate one’s inner masculine and feminine polarities. This corresponds
to Jung’s exploration of our anima (feminine aspect) and animus (masculine
aspect). The tantric tradition is very austere and requires strict discipline
to follow specific rituals. True progress on this path can only be achieved
under the strict guidance of a Tantric master. Translator of the definitive book
on lovemaking for centuries the Kama Sutra, Alain Danielou said in regards to
Tantric S*x: "Only the ignorant attempt to learn mantras from books and
practice rites according to what they read. It is necessary to follow the
instructions of a genuine Tantric guru".
Exploring Tantric S*x without expert guidance can lead to a disturbance in
one's subtle body which may cause psychological and physical imbalances.
AYURVEDIC WISDOM
According to the Vedas, life can be divided into four main concerns :
spiritual duties (dharma), economic development (artha), love or pursuit of
pleasure (kama) and liberation from the cycle of repeated birth and death
(moksha). Vedic literature states that the wise choose ways of acting that
allow them to achieve the four aims of life without letting the pursuit of
pleasure lead them to ruin. One is advised to practise all four activities at
different times and in such a manner that they may harmonise together and not
clash in any way.
With this aim in mind, Ayurveda advises one follow certain observances
in order to gain the maximum benefit from S*xual union and to avoid detrimental
effects.
GUIDELINES FOR A QUALITY EXPERIENCE
“For the perfect love tryst Ayurvedic scholar Sushruta recommends a full
moon night in a bower of flowers, soft silk garments, sweet and intoxicating
perfumes, light and nourishing food and sweet music.” - translated by Robert
Svoboda
- Choose
a time when you are both relaxed and aroused. The best time for S*x is
before midnight to ensure sufficient rest is taken afterwards.
- Prepare
a beautiful, peaceful and seductive setting that provides a feast for all
your sense organs. Bathe in or anoint the body in essential oils of
Sandalwood, Ylang Ylang, Patchouli, Neroli or Rose. Incense or oil burners
with these scents also contribute to the erotic mood.
- Dress
in attractive, clean attire and wear a fresh flower garland.
- A
lubricant of equal parts ghee and honey may be used.
- Play
special Indian musical Ragas for a romantic mood include: Mishra Telang,
Mishra Ghara, Mishra Bhairavi.
- It
is emphasised to take enough time and attention to pleasing one's partner.
Both the Kama Sutra and the Ananga Ranga outline in great detail the art
of foreplay and emphasise the importance of satisfying both partner's
desires. The Ananga Ranga compares a woman to a fruit that only yeilds its
fragrance after being rubbed with the hands. The Kama Sutra suggests that
during congress the man should make a point of pressing those parts of the
body on which the woman turns her eyes and greatly elaborates on
techniques of kissing, nibbling, sucking, fondling the hair, caressing and
embracing. This contributes to the partner’s ecstasy and satiation.
- After
S*x a cool shower, a rejuvenative drink such as warm almond milk with a
pinch of saffron and 1 tsp of honey and new clothing are advised.
- S*x
is not recommended during illness as it exhausts Ojas (the body's source
of immunity and vitality). S*x can be practised more frequently in winter
than in summer. During pregnancy, menstruation and after a heavy meal S*x
is also to be avoided as it disturbs the natural downward flow of Air and
Ether (Apana Vayu)
CREATIVE ESSENCE
“Ojas is the sap of our life energy” - David Frawley
Ayurveda classifies the body into seven bodily tissues (dhatus) known as
plasma (rasa), blood (rakta), flesh (mamsa), fat (medas), bone (asthi), marrow
(majja) and reproductive fluids (shukra). Products of the reproductive system
are the seventh dhatu or bodily tissue. The sperm and ovum are considered very
important, as they are the end result of the metabolism of the preceding six
tissues. In this way the reproductive tissue is the cream of all the body's
metabolic efforts. If the quality of the reproductive tissue is pure, then the
greatest miracle of the body can be performed, that of creating a child. That
same life-creating energy if directed inwards can facilitate renewal of our own
body and mind.
The pure reproductive fluids (shukra) create the subtle essence called
ojas. Ojas is not a physical substance but is more like the essential energy of
the immune system. When ojas is strong and pure in our being we have a strong
aura, bright eyes, strong immunity and mental clarity. Excess loss of sperm
causes low immune function, weak digestion, lassitude and mental
dullness.
Unrestricted S*xual activity is regarded in Ayurveda as one of the acts
most detrimental to health not because S*x in itself is bad, but because it
strains the nerves, exhausts the bodily tissues, increases vata (air and
ether), thus creating dryness and irritability in a person and decreases ojas,
the essence of immunity and vitality.
Eminent Ayurvedic physician Professor Subash Ranade shares a view held
by Hippocrates when he stated: "Individuals who do not regulate their S*xual
impulses are more prone to loss of strength, weak immune function, and various
diseases owing to depletion of vitality. Those who regulate their S*xual energy
will have increased memory, power, intelligence, health, and
longevity".
Dr. Satyavrata Siddhantalankar, an eminent Yogi, is an amazing
example of health and vitality in his nineties, much of which he attributes to
following the Ayurvedic guidelines for S*xual activity. In his book "From
Old Age to Youth Through Yoga" Dr. Satyavrata quotes "The
Encyclopaedia of Physical Culture" concerning the impact of the loss of
semen: "One ounce of semen is estimated by some authorities as being
equivalent in energy to sixty ounces of blood." Perhaps that can explain
why men often collapse into an exhausted sleep after ejaculation, feeling
sapped of energy. Author of The Tao of Loving, Jolan Chang agrees, " When
a man has ejaculated, it is like letting the air out of a balloon - he feels
flat."
If ejaculation is avoided for a long period of time the sperm undergoes
autolysis, breaking up and reabsorbing into the body to contribute towards a
more youthful, vigorous body and clarity of mind.
We can learn a lot from animals who regulate and moderate their S*xual
activity. Even those infamous breeders, rabbits don’t mate in autumn and many
species such as wolves mate only for procreation, choosing a monogamous
relationship for life.
TIPS FOR RETAINING SEMEN
With an aim to conserve and circulate energy through your body the
following technique is used to prevent ejaculation. At the point of peak
arousal inhale deeply, place the tip of your tongue on the root of your mouth
and tighten the PC muscle. Press firmly on a soft indent in the perineum
located between the scrotum and anus. Exhale, relaxing the anal and genital
muscles. If the urge for ejaculation continues, squeeze the frenulum (behind
the glans penis) with your thumb and forefinger until the urge subsides. Imagine
drawing your S*xual energy from your genitals to your heart. Gently stroking
your genitals to your heart. Visualise a warm pink glow moving from your
genitals to your pelvis and to your heart. You can experience an internal
blissful orgasm through this process, leaving you energised rather than
depleted.
BODY-TYPE TENDENCIES
The Ayurvedic system of classifying one’s psycho-physiological
constitution according to the predominance of elements gives an interesting
insight into our unique S*xual behaviour. Our body-type can be determined by
completing an Ayurvedic questionnaire or through consultation with an Ayurvedic
physician. The three main body-types and their S*xual characteristics are as
follows.
Vata (air & ether)
A Vata lover tends to be erratic and romantic. Mental foreplay such as
flowery poetry or stimulating discussion is the best aphrodisiac for Vata.
Touch and sensuality is very soothing and relaxing for highly-strung Vata
types. An oil massage combined with soothing music is the ultimate therapy to
set the mood. Since Vata people suffer from dramatically fluctuating energy
levels they are only interesting in making love when they have the energy, more
often in the morning rather than the evening.
Vata types should avoid S*xual excess as it depletes their energy and
strains their nervous system. Since their body’s are drier than the other
constitutions Vata types are advised to take regular reproductive tonics and
rejuvenative drinks after fluid loss.
The best partner for a Vata Body -Type : Kapha Pitta or Pitta Kapha
Pitta (fire & water)
Pitta can personify the archetypical hot Latin lovers. They have a natural
passion and gusto for making love. Their ego- centred desire for strong
gratification and stimulation can result in a lack of sensitivity and
tenderness with their partner. S*x can turn into a competitive display of
prowess for Pitta as well as a vent for suppressed hostility. Pitta have to
consciously tune into the needs of their partner and avoid dominating or
rushing them. Pitta types always appreciate visual stimulation hence gentle
lighting, nice garments and flowers will heighten their arousal. Pitta are the
body-type most prone to impotence due to over-excess. They can avoid burn- out
by channelling S*xual energy into creative pursuits and taking cooling
rejuvenatives and a cool shower after S*x. Pitta needs to learn to redirect
their emotions through their heart rather than through their genitals.
The ideal partner for a Pitta Body-Type: Kapha, Kapha- Pitta or Pitta-
Kapha
Kapha (water & earth)
Ancient figures of the fertility goddess exemplify the qualities of a Kapha
lover. These body-types are made for love. Embodying the ideal qualities of
endurance, affection, sensuality and sensitivity, Kaphas can be both mother and
lover to spouse. They have abundant fertility, making them “good breeders.”
This explains why in India the chubbier body build of a kapha is a desirable
feature in a partner. Calm, gentle and romantic lovers they can become boring
and lazy if unmotivated. Kaphas are also the most likely type to become
co-dependant and clingy. They need constant encouragement to develop their own
interests, exploring new avenues of self-development.
The preferable partner for a Kapha Body- Type: Anyone with enthusiasm,
passion and motivation
PHASES OF S*X THROUGH LIFE
Ayurveda divides life into four main phases during which the role of S*x
changes. The purpose of these phases is to bring an individual fulfilment and
satiation of their material desires so they may then transcend material
attachments and ultimately attain spiritual enlightenment.
The typical phases of life are as follows:
1) Youth Brahmacharyam > Birth up to 25
years, > celibate student phase
2) Prime Gaarhasthyam > 25 years to 50
years, > family life
3) Maturity Vaanaprastham > 50 years to 65
years, > retire from worldly duties
4) Sunset years Sanyasam > 65 years until
death, >renunciation
BRAHMACHARYAM Birth - 25 yrs
Brahma means the knowledge leading to self-realisation and charya means
regimen. This is the stage of life where one learns to control one's
senses in order to focus on study and attain a ripened understanding about
life. Brahmacharya is also the third rule of social conduct (Yama) advised in
the eight-limbed path of yoga.
Control of S*xual energy is of special significance in teenage years
when the libido hormone testosterone is at its peak. S*xual stimulation at this
time will promote testosterone which is linked with hostility and agitation.
Reducing S*xual stimulus will help to stabilise testosterone and re-direct S*xual
energy to develop the mind and body. Physical, mental and spiritual maturity is
developing during this time. It is the time to build one's character, establish
positive habits and develop insight into one's role in society. This is a
period of concentrated learning in order to gain wisdom that will enable one to
navigate through life's stormy weather.
Ayurveda advises complete S*xual abstinence during this period so that
one can channel S*xual energy into pursuits of mental and physical development.
Emotionally one is deemed too immature to deal with the psychological
implications and responsibilities entailed by a S*xual relationship.
GAARHASTHYAM 25 - 50 yrs
" Love doesn't consist of gazing at each other but in looking
together in the same direction." - St. Francis of Xupery
When one feels emotionally and physically mature enough for the
responsibilities of marriage it's the right time to seek out a partner.
Traditionally this is the only context for S*xual relations. Through the
sanctity of marriage one obtains blessings from divine forces, family and
friends. Indian Saint, Swami Sivananda warns that anyone we wilfully have S*x
with will one day be our spouse, either in this life or future lives. He says
we will have to continue this relationship until a harmonious relationship is
established. This may be one of the reasons that divorce rates are very low in
India, there is a feeling that unresolved problems with one’s spouse will simply
come in another form.
There are many different ways of meeting a suitable partner described in
Vatsayana's "Kama Sutra ". The conclusion is that the marriage based
on love called the gandharva marriage brings the most happiness to a
couple.
Indian society was very coy when dealing with matters of the heart.
There are many sweet details given concerning the means to attract a
prospective partner and entice them into marriage. This usually involved the
cunning involvement of the desired partner's family or friends as go-betweens.
Once a prospective spouse was found compatibility was scrutinised from all
aspects including astrological, familial, physical, mental and spiritual. Often
the couple would not have formally met but are attracted to each other by
hearing about or seeing each other. If the couple are deemed incompatible by
any of these calculations, the union is rarely formed. This is quite different
from the basis of many Western unions which are often based on subjective
passion and attraction. The Veda has a saying which warns against this:
“Relationships commencing in passion’s raging fire often end in the coolest
ashes”
The svayamvara marriage of the past was practiced by warrior princesses.
When a princess desired to get married her parents would invite all interested
suitors to come and apply for their daughter's hand in marriage. Many qualified
and attractive suitors would assemble from various regions. They would compete
in different tests of physical and mental strength so as to display their
qualities to the onlooking princess. When the competitions were over the
princess would place a flower garland over the neck of the man she chose as her
husband.
The ideal marriage according to Ayurveda is when a woman loves and
revers her husband as a guru and in turn he loves and revers her as a goddess.
Neither are considered spiritually superior, but that the act of loving is the
means to transformation and the purpose of marriage is to help one another to
become greater than they could alone. The saintly Mother of Sri Aurobindo
Ashrama describes marriage :
" To unite your physical existences and your material interests, to
associate yourselves so as to face together the difficulties and successes, the
defeats and victories of life - this is the very basis of marriage - but you
know already that it does not suffice. To be one in aspiration and ascension,
to advance to the same step on the spiritual path- such is the secret of a
durable union".
VAANAPRASTHAM 50 - 65 yrs.
Retiring from worldly duties and living in a secluded peaceful place,
concentrating on spiritual practices is known as Vaanaprastham. Traditionally
this is the phase of life when a married couple begin to gradually strip away
all their material entanglements, turning to spiritual practices with increased
dedication. The Vedic concept of the goal of life is to transcend material
suffering and attain a blissful state of self-realisation. In order accept a
new spiritual reality in life one must purify the heart of selfish desires such
as anger, hate, greed and lust.
Vaanaprastham is the period during which work and family obligations are
slowly reduced in preparation for the period of total renunciation or sanyasam.
Ideally at this time one's children are mature and independant and one is
financially secure. The body is starting to show signs of aging, a
reminder that death is inevitable and preparation to face it must begin. The
ancient epic "The Mahabharata" illustrates human's unwillingness to
face the reality of death when the epic's hero Yuddhistirsa is questioned in
order to save his brothers life. The Yaksha asked Yuddhisthira "What is
the greatest wonder in the world?" to which Yuddhisthira replies "Day
after day and hour after hour, people die and corpses are carried along, yet
the onlookers never realise that they are to die one day, but think they will
live forever. This is the greatest wonder of the world." Vaanaprastham is
the phase of life when one starts to seriously prepare for this reality, a time
when one may retire from employment and dedicate one's time to philanthropic
pursuits leaving plenty of time for contemplation and meditation.
Any superfluous material possessions may be given away at this time and
a couple may choose to move to a simple, peaceful dwelling, keeping possessions
to a minimum. During this time interest in S*xual activity naturally declines
as one has come to a state of S*xual satiation and developed a greater
attachment for less sensually oriented pursuits. Plato once quoted an old man
on this subject who said "In old age you become quite free of passions of
this sort and they leave you in peace; and when your desires lose their
intensity and relax, you get a release from slavery to your many
passions."
Society today is highly suspicious and even panicked at the hint of any
weakening of the S*xual drive but the opposite is true in Vedic culture. People
who have naturally raised their energy and interests above that of S*xual
pleasure and developed a higher consciousness are revered as the highest models
of wisdom. With age, interest in S*x naturally declines, despite many deluded
people's attempts to retain their S*xual drive with the use of endangered
animal's parts such as tiger's penis' and rinosaurus’ horns as aphrodisiacs. A
constant preoccupation with S*x is not healthy; nor is it in humanity's highest
interest. S*xuality should never be suppressed or a source of guilt yet as
one's passion to enjoy another's body subdues with age one naturally turns to
more enduring and enriching ways to relate to one's partner. The lasting union
is marked by a shared passion for life, not just for S*x. This is the process
of Vaanaprastham.
SANYASAM 65 to death
"As advancing age cools his passions he turns to think of his
creator, to study religious subjects and to acquire divine knowledge.”- Ananga
Ranga by Kalyana Malla
Sanyasam means "selecting the most appropriate path." This is
when the inward journey really begins. At this time the husband and wife see
each other purely as partners in the journey to self- realisation. They will
have minimal contact in physical matters and aim to spend their time whole
heartedly propagating and investigating the highest spiritual truths of life.
Sometimes they may choose to live separately as they fully absorb themselves in
spiritual practices and pilgrimages to holy places. This is the time for
burning up one's vasanas or innate material desires.
Not everyone is expected to enter the sanyasa phase of life as it
requires a strong dedication and desire to devote oneself fully to spiritual
life. Traditionally this path is only taken up by true spiritual warriors,
those driven to experience the rare nectar of complete spiritual surrender.
CELIBACY
“An angel doesn’t make love, an angel is love” - Pigar, from the film
Barbarella
Some rare souls choose to skip the gaarhasthyam and vaanaprastham phase
of life and take to the austere, celibate life of sanyasam for their whole
lives. Such people are known as goswamis (male) or goswaminis (female)
translated as "masters of the senses." In contrast most people are in
the unfortunate position of being godas' or "servants of the senses",
having to pamper to their sense's every whim just to feel some relief from
suffering caused by sensual hankering. Renounciates don't see their path as
austere or difficult as they experience transcendental pleasure far superior to
enjoyment offered through any temporary, limited material pursuits.
Healthy celibacy doesn't indicate an absence of S*xual energy it simply
shows that the celibate has learned to re-direct that energy into other areas
of life. Celibacy does not rule out intimacy of human friendships as it is not
a question of uprooting S*xuality but of becoming S*xual in a different way. On
the other hand unnatural, repressive celibacy can create serious psychological
damage and a perverted attitude towards S*x as Krishnamurti elucidates
"Chastity of the monk with his vow is worldliness as long as his urges are
present."
CONSCIOUS CONCEPTION
"The natural man has only two primal passions - to get and
beget" - Sir William Osler, physician
Ayurveda instructs couples in great detail concerning the methods to
conceive a child with strong health, intelligence and spirituality. The Vedic
scriptures count procreation as one of the main fourteen rituals (samskaras) of
life. The ritual of conception is known as Garbhadhana samskara or
"placing the seed in the womb". A couple is advised to purify and
rejuvenate their body and mind in order to create the strongest child possible
and to reduce the probability of passing on the handicap of genetic disease
patterns. The child's constitutional strengths and weaknesses are fixed at the
time of birth so responsible parents can follow all measures to give their
child the healthiest start in life.
A couple should consult an Ayurvedic physician or Ayurvedic
paediatrician (kaumara bhritya) at least six months prior to conception in
order to undergo the necessary purification and rejuvenation treatments.
The duration and nature of the preparatory therapies depends on the health
status of the couple. In order to attract the type of child they desire most
the couple spend months before conception practising specific affirmations and
visualisations to welcome the child into their lives. The spirit that chooses
to enter the womb of the mother is determined by the parent's consciousness at
birth. This can determine whether the couples will conceive a child with a
lovable, compatible nature or a difficult child bearing many psychic and
physical problems.
Spiritual practices are given to the parents which includes reading from
scriptures about auspicious off-spring and reciting mantras in order to purify
and focus the couple's awareness on the purpose of the S*xual union.
The most auspicious time for conception should be calculated by an
astrologer (Jyotishi) in order to avoid any malefic planetary influences. Three
days after the completion of menses or at the time of ovulation is also
recommended as the best time to conceive. For eight hours before conception the
couple practices meditation and affirmations as directed by the Ayurvedic physician,
this includes a clear perception of the qualities they would like their child
to possess.
The couple can take light, nourishing and cooling foods during the time
before conception in conjunction with the prescribed reproductive tonics.
After preparing the room and one's body in the manner described under
guidelines for a quality experience, a ritual offering of incense, flowers,
water and food can be made to the appropriate source of spiritual inspiration
and protection. A mantra to be chanted before conception follows:
"ATHIRASI AYURASI SARVATAH PRATISHTHASI DHATA TVA DADHAATU BRAHMA VARCHASA
BHAVA." It translates: “May our child, a divine gift from the creator, be
blessed with longevity, sacred wisdom, bliss and be welcomed by all.” This
empowers the act with a very positive and definite vibration, creating the most
conducive environment for the soul to enter the womb.
When the atmosphere is most conducive and stimulating for union the man
ascends the bed with his right leg and the woman with her left leg. The couple
then unite to share a loving and blissful climax. The Ayurvedic text Charaka
Samhita states that the best position for conception is the woman lying on her
back with the man on top. The Kama Sutra elaborates by suggesting the woman's legs
wrap around the partner and they hold together in a tight embrace, increasing
the pleasure for both. It is this sense of ecstasy and contentment along
with one's focused intention that will imbibe the child with a healthy and
secure mental and physical constitution.
S*XUAL TONICS
"The aim of virilisation is to enable a couple to produce a healthy
progeny who can help them to perform their dharma (life's mission)"-
Chakrapani, the commentator of Charaka Samhita.
The branch of reproductive tonics in Ayurveda is known as Vajikarana.
The word "Vaji" means one with perfectly healthy sperm or ovum. So
the term "Vajikarana" means that which produces healthy sperm or
ovum.
The main aim behind this concept is to ensure the production of a
healthy, intelligent, well-motivated child by ensuring healthy parents and full
S*xual ecstasy at conception, the time when the child's constitution is fixed.
To ensure this Ayurveda advises full bodily purification before virilization treatment.
Vajikaranas are tonics to both the male and female reproductive organs and they
also excite the S*xual organs which is more relevant to men since they have to
maintain an erection for conception and they loose more S*xual fluids than a
woman does.
S*XUAL HEALING
MAKING LOVE
“ When you perceive yourself as spirit, you will not simply feel love
you will be love” - Deepak Chopra
Since the S*xual revolution we have come to analyse the mechanics of S*xual
technique yet failed to appreciate the emotional and spiritual implications of S*x.
In our pursuit of pleasure, the role of S*x has been grossly over-emphasised.
Having S*x without making love is a shallow and dissatisfying experience. When
we make love as a means to expand our heart, our every action, every sound,
every caress will express our loving feelings and it can be a transformative
experience. However, when most of us reflect on the pleasurable experiences in
our life it has nothing to do with what goes on between the sheets. Experiences
that reinforce the loving connection with our family, friends, strangers,
nature and a higher force bring us ultimate pleasure.
Vedic wisdom warns against giving undue preference to one aspect of our
being, thereby neglecting to develop our full potential. The world’s oldest
scripture, the Bhagavad-Gita 111.37, states that lust is the greatest
enemy as it leads to self-absorption, anger and deluded meaning in life. It
calls for a ‘love revolution’ where we channel our energy towards the service
of all beings. This will result in deeply fulfilling, long-term pleasure.
Increasing our capacity to give and receive love is life’s greatest lesson and
challenge. To achieve this is the true sign of spiritual evolution as ”in the
evening of life, we will be judged on love alone,” St. John of the Cross.
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